| Day by day by day |
[01 May 2008|06:41pm] |
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Im feeling a little strange. Last night Joshua, John Gardner, Sonny, and I went to this bar called The Old Colony, which is Pinkies basically but a little more rustic sea side. The walls are all that dark yellow shiny wood as well as the floor and the bar itself kind of looks like someone just put it together with scraps from a boat they took apart. There are big bells and those lights that make everything yellow. Its right out of Pirates of the Caribbean. Everyone got WAY too drunk and sonny and josh went outside to smoke some weed with a few locals, which was a bad idea because when sonny drinks tequilas and smokes smoke, he does dumb things. So Josh and Sonny were kicked out of the bar for stealing mixers and chugging them. I feel very exhausted from it all. It is really hard to get back into the life of figuring out what everyone wants to do and working around other peoples likes and dislikes. Im not used to it. Its nice having people here but a little draining at the same time. I freaked out a little bit thinking about not seeing my family in so long and not being surrounded by friends.
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[24 Apr 2008|08:52pm] |
Today was nice. When I work alone I talk to the customer A LOT. Its nice though because some of them will stand around and talk about random stuff for a half hour. Really kills time! I sat on the beach tonight and made a bon fire, it was so nice. It kept me warm and was so beautiful. My grandma always said when you have a fire you have company. And it is SO true. its better actually. A Goofy Movie is on TV and I have to watch it whenever its on because it is actually one of my favorite movies. And I always cry at least four times. I cant wait to be a dad. I will be just like goofy. Too loving and smothering. Joshua will be here in four days. That is really going to change the way I am living. Im not saying that I will stop laying out nude on the porch....just sayin. haha.
I dont even know why, but even that scene makes me cry, CRY!
Im gonna be Powerline for halloween
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| MY DAY OFF! |
[22 Apr 2008|11:30pm] |
Finally a day OFF! JUST KIDDING. For reasons unknown I have had to work every single "day off" for the past three weeks. Today I worked for 13 hours :( but the store I have been waiting two months for to open finally did and I got to buy this shirt I have been eyeing for quite some time. I really was intending on giving it to jon lynn once I got it, but I dont know. I like it a lot. But it really reminds me of him. I got new glasses today, they are really thin frames and tortoise shell. Nice, but too smart looking for me. Or maybe too old. Im exhausted, Hans is coming tomorrow to clean which means I have to clean before, but all I want to do is lay on the beach. Its supposed to be 65 tomorrow! that is the hottest this year. Well see if that happens.
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| Passover |
[20 Apr 2008|09:16am] |
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Contemplating Veganism |
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Yesterday started with me being very angry at Sonny the boy I work with. He really manipulated the system and got out of work on the busiest day of the year so far, It was really interesting when someone needed a different size to try on and I had to RUN as fast as I could, find the clothes and then scope out if people had stone things..... It was stressful at first, but then I got really high on diet coke and turned up my Sly and the Family Stone radio station and everything was really easy. All I need is a sugar high and some graham central station to really inspire me. And thank god I have made friends in the older business owners here because I would not have eaten anything all day if this guy steve didnt show up with a slice of pizza and a diet coke. bless 'im. So I was stuck at work until 8:30 and had to RUN home to change pants and go to dinner/seder and The Red Inn with Robert and Suzie and a hand full of old people that he invites randomly. Sonny was there too. I know you are only allowed wine on passover but Robert bought me a bottle of Dom for myself? For some reason, so I drank it ALL! and thank god I had it too because I ordered a 2 1/2 pound lobster and it came with claws and tail and legs and eyes and IT WAS SO FUCKING GROSS. I couldnt eat it, it was the size of 88! I am used to lobster being all skinned and ready to just eat, but this was gross, I had to crack its rib cage and dig around its innards with a baby fork and suck things out of cavities, Granted I just didnt eat it, I gave it to Hans who was sitting next to me. It was just too much. Anyway so dinner ends and I am just completely wasted. Mission Accomplished. In other NEWS, my parents have gone completely crazy, the process is complete. I dont know if I have voiced this before, but I think they are going to be homeless for the rest of their lives. I hope thats not true, but thats what it looks like right now.
Next time in Israel Courtney
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[18 Apr 2008|09:10pm] |
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I am beside myself, I am so tired. I have had the most exhausting four days and I know its only the beginning. I was properly inducted into my Manager position by Robert Duffy letting me know I am not working hard enough, that I dont know what I am supposed to know, and that my store looks like SHIT! hahaha. That being said I was at he store from 9 am to 2 am the day before he got there unloading 200 boxes between me and Luke. Its so weird. He yelled at me for the weirdest things, but he did pull me aside and tell me " Cameron, Im not mad at you, do you know that? I just want to show you how to run a business." So that made me feel a LOT better about the whole thing. We went to dinner and did that whole thing, and then the next day he started off mean again. He told me that I couldnt bring the dog to work! but I think he could really tell how much that upset me so he took it back and rented the apartment next to the office "so the dog has a place to go when its too hot" hahahaha but also for a lot of other reasons. "Are you happy now?!" Hes so funny. I think he is figuring out how he wants to treat me. apart from being mean he told me "I can tell somethings bothering you Cameron, if you need anything come to my house. Food, Cash, Car, whatever." So he kind of feels like a really great uncle when hes in the right mood. Besides work there is...... NOTHING. So many people are in town this week end, and it really amazed me how quickly everything turned around. there are groups of old hippie people on bikes going the wrong way down a one way, droves of teen age kids running around, and about an even number of gay and straight couples shopping. There is actually a really cool mens clothing, accessories store that is open now and a million antique stores. But really the last thing I care about right now is shopping. I just want to lay on my bed and watch the real housewives of new york run with a fabulous network of people and spend thousands of dollars at designer stores. Yeah, that sounds nice.
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| The Sun |
[11 Apr 2008|06:25am] |
This morning I woke up in a very different, calm, optimistic, mood, right as the sun was starting to show itself at 5:30. Its hard not to first wake up then since my bedroom windows face directly where the sun rises. Instead of throwing my arm over my eyes and going back to sleep however, I decided to WAKE UP! To watch the sun rise, in honor of the birth of courtney!, in honor of my friendship with christian!, in honor of me being a new uncle to Grady James Castro as of last night!!!, and in honor of how amazing the son is. I think its going to be a good day. Happy Birthday Courtney!
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| Friday |
[07 Apr 2008|10:07pm] |
This morning I started my day by waking up late and calling a cab to get to work, I have been really sleep deprived and just exhausted. When I went to call the cab though, I could hear some really gay man talking to some lady, I listened to their conversation for a little while but it was really boring so i just dialed the taxi, and then I heard them talk about how they could hear me haha, this happened to me before a long time ago, but it was with my best friends cell phone and they couldnt hear us, we could just pick up on random calls occasionally.... it was magical. I told the taxi to come and I heard the guy say "oh my gawed its the boy from Marc Jacobs, HOW WEIRD" and I hung up. He later came into my work and told me all about it, and I pretended that I didnt know what he was talking about because I didnt want to connect with him or elongate the conversation, but he demanded that I call the phone company and have it fixed, and I said sure, but knowing me I will forget about it. I am way too distracted by how beautiful and magnificent 88 is. She makes me so happy. I made a video of her and I hunting jamaicans and running on the beach but Its too long to upload, I'm lazy. The jamaicans are all coming back and I really love jamaicans. well at least the ones I know. I was playing the Harry Belafonte station at work and they were alllll into it, with the drink the coconut water etc. and they tell good stories. Its nice to have new different "groups" of people to meet and learn their characteristics. not to say I live to learn generalities. My grandma randomly sent me a letter saying " I hope you are eating well and taking care of yourself, eat lots of fruits and vegetables and if you like buttermilk, that is very good for you" ............... hahaha. I cant say I like butter milk, but she is 95 so I might start drinking some. Everyone is suggesting things for me to drink lately, courtney and he something root, christian and his cream of creams and nana and her chunky milk. But im a try-er. I guess. Anyway im tired and I want to sleep for 12 hours so I will leave you with this.
http://giraffesat12oclock.ytmnd.com/
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| Ayayayay |
[05 Apr 2008|09:33pm] |
This morning I woke up to my mother calling me at about 7:00, and of course she had nothing to say, she jut wanted to hear me suffer my way into consciousness. "see you haven't had your morning coffee, heh heh" she said Im sure ive mentioned it before, but she calls me for NO REASON AT ALL! hahaha. But I actually really love being woken up by a phone call, or even better a person! I had my morning bowl of Puffins with Very Vanilla soy milk and Blueberries. Its the small things that make my day wonderful. I stripped down and hopped in the shower, and today 88 decided she needed a washing too, she jumped in. Im thankful for that too, because she was getting a little gamey. While showering I came in contact with my least favorite four letter word, and no I dont mean Shit... Hahahahaha. a Lump! and I can be kind of a hypochondriac, but a lump of any kind would scare anyone I'm sure. Its high up on my leg next to... myself. Why I am I writing about this? haha. Well it scared me so I called molly because I remember we called her mom for health advice once before. I don't know what to do, but I definitely know that if it gets bigger at all I am going to take the first flight to NY and get scanned, because the closest hospital here is an hours drive and its supposed to be the absolute worst. And robert told me to go to New York if something happens. I am sure its nothing to worry about, but in this day and age a lump is the enemy of the human race. anyway, I had a good day at work. After having my friend eddy come from boston to help me get shit together, I started to feel better about work, he is a really good worker, which I am not used to because the boy I work with can be rather sluggish. It was also nice just to hang out with eddy, we went to a nice restaurant and drank 6 beers! and whiskey! we were both a mess, but managed to meet at the store at 7 am sharp to get an early start. Hes really fun, and we were able to connect at a metal head level. I think I might be going to boston here and there because they have some amazing concerts. I am kind of happy to be in the north east, its so easy to get to a lot of great things. The weather is getting so much better and some REALLY good places have opened to grab lunch. Which is such a relief because I am SOOO tired of "Bayside Betsy's" and "The Boxed Lunch". I am watching a commercial for a cd called "Celtic Thunder" looks good HAHAHA. I laugh and cry and fart so much more now that I live alone, for real its weird. I think I shut up my emotions A LOT when I am around people, which I hope I am fixing in this time. Anyway I am watching Elizabeth and its back on and I am really enjoying it so I will go finish that.
Call me beep me
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| Monday is really Friday in Provincetown |
[31 Mar 2008|01:52pm] |
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Today I am excited, and inspired to write since everyone else is doing so well. Luke from Boston is coming, as usual, but this time early so that he can help me get all the stuff moved out of the store so it can be painted. Tuesday the guys will just be repainting everything so we wont have to do much, but will be payed for the day, which is nice. I am thinking maybe I will cook for the boys. I desperately need to cook for someone. I saw a black person today which may not sound too exciting, but there are NO black people here at all. Its a complete fake little world...at least in the winter. I have found myself compensating for this by listening to a lot of The Roots and Nas and My boy Tupac. I finished one of those giant bottles of Jaagermeister last night, and ended up drinking whiskey straight up. I slept like a rock... But now that I got my new computer maybe I will have less boredom. I ordered the new IMac and its so much bigger than I expected, but it shines with a halo of godly light in all its glory. Im happy to no longer be handicapped with my old labtop. But for now anyway I sit here at work reading livejournal as it is the only thing I can get on, on this network. Its really starting to get busy with tourist on the weekend, which is exciting. I got a nice camera so I will take a million pictures. Until then
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| Friday |
[28 Mar 2008|09:28pm] |
I returned that camera because it wasnt good enough for how much it cost. Someone suggest a good one that works. Today was very very very very boring. in contrast to FREE FOOD DAY which was yesterday I think, I cant even remember. But since Restaurants are starting to open back up they offer free food to "locals" so I jumped on that train and had a really gassy night. My whole body feels exhausted, and I dont know if its from staying up late watching my shows or standing up all day and doing hunched over office work. I ordered a new computer today, which was overdue, since the one I work on now shuts down if you close it or if you unplug it for a second. 88 and I have been exploring the extent of low tide, because it is so shallow that you can walk really far out, but for the same reasonwhen it starts to come in, it does so at an ALARMING RATE! We almost got trapped as the waterwas rushing back around us. Other than that I look foreward to getting drunk and going to my favorite mexican restaurant every friday and saturday. Reema is the bartender and she is more than used to my lonely conversation. "It may be a crazy life, But its our life." - Jon and Kate + 8
Haha. I been drinky
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[24 Mar 2008|07:48pm] |
here is satans church and a monument built by THE pilgrims for people to commit suicide .
This is me talking with my therapist. I do this often.
This is my back yard
And this is my back yard looking at my house
I will take more pictures, I just wanted to put a few up
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| Plamena |
[17 Mar 2008|11:14pm] |
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Idol really has the ability to entertain me in any language or region. I have been watching bulgarian idol after seeing "Ken Lee" the engrish version of Without You. I Love Plamena Petrovna
and have always loved Paul Potts.
and Ken Lee
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| Randy Rhoades |
[11 Mar 2008|07:31pm] |
Today 88 and I walked across the Break water which is right next to my house. It is just a long straight (1.2miles) or jagged rocks put there to keep some water in the wetlands I think? but it works as a pathway out to the tip of west point. I had to carry 88 there because she was really freaked out, but once we got out there, she was fine and it was so beautiful. Its just all sand and grass and water and really pretty, you can see the whole cape winding around and the light house is right there. It was nice to look at provincetown from a ways away, It felt like a real getaway. We sat on this big cement block that washed up until the sun started to set and then headed back, and she walked all the way by herself. When I got home I found my Ozzy Osbourne CD and played it in the living room really loud since my neighbor went back to his real life today. I forgot the major crust I had on Randy Rhoades, the guitarist for Ozzy Osbourne. I loved him, and he is the best guitarist I have ever heard in my life. If you get a chance listen to the entire CD Blizzard of Oz. its amazing
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| Dear Diaryuh |
[08 Mar 2008|10:23pm] |
03-08-08
I finally understand why old people always know what the date is! Its because in their office work it is the only thing they write all day long that shows them what time of year it is, how long until they retire, die, etc. I have to write the date a lot at my work. Today was really nasty outside. I started it by taking 88 on a long walk to get all the poop and piss out of her, and we ran into Robert his beautiful dog hudson, and his new "boyfriend" something. But hes really not something. I had the opportunity to have a one on one with him in our drunken stupor the other night at dinner. He seems really convinced that he is going to be dating Robert for a while and that "there is something that just works!" I hope hes right for his sake, but seeing the number of guys I have seen him go through in the last month alone doesnt give me much hope for him. He looks like a male escort. Im going to be fired for this entry. Luckily we got to close really early today because of the weather and Robert told us to go home. I have been trying to make my house look like I live here and its coming along sort of. I think my housekeeper is going to have a heart attack when he sees all the shit Ive added. Hes really anal for someone who doesnt own this house. I went to Dinner at Lorraines tonight by myself and sat at the bar AGAIN and there was a different bar tender, luckily for me, so my story was new to her and she was more friendly. I had paella and I dont know why because I dont like fish in soup but the clams and shrimp here are SO amazing. I almost forgot that this morning I had an interesting run in with my neighbor ( I didnt know I had any ). I was getting out of the shower and standing naked in my bedroom looking at the tv... and all of a sudden there is this man on my back porch with his dog just standing there! He was looking at me and I said "HI!" with that kind of emotion in my voice that made it mean something more like "What the hell are you doing?" and he mouthed "sorry and pointed to the dog?" so I put my robe on and went in the kitchen. we have been avoiding eachother since then. Good thing the pounds have been melting off since I dont eat sakura anymore....since that was the only fattening party of my life in savannah. At any rate not much is different. I went to a movie store today and bought some John Waters movies. And while doing so I was told "oh he comes in here all the time!" so there is hope! The summer "locals" are starting to movie back and things are slowly staying open longer or opening period. I bought these granola bars with 9 grams of fiber in them and they are really working my paella right now, so I will end with that.
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| A New Frontier! |
[04 Mar 2008|09:34pm] |
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"I am the worst communicator, and it is my downfall. Soon I will be alone in Savannah forever."
That was saved in my post box from the last time I attempted to write something. I have learned in the last two weeks that neither of those things are true. Here I am in Provincetown Massachusetts, my new home on the very tip of cape cod. I live at #17 delft haven on commercial street, right on the beach in all its beauty, ALONE. About the first week here was very busy and I was distracted enough to not feel the loss right away, but I do miss Savannah terribly. I will take pictures as often as possible as soon as possible, but I am yet to get my phone back from apple so that is to come later. I can say that it is a strange place I live in and not much is really going on. I have to really search for things to entertain me. I have taken to using the taxi as both a mode of transportation and entertainment as they pick up multiple passengers along my ride. Everyone is always headed someplace strange and are very open to talking about where and why they are going. So Ive made a deal with Jodie, the obese lesbian taxi driver, to let me stay in on the ride as long as possible. Sometimes it is just me and her, she talks about the latest installment of her internet sexcapades which are so hard to believe seeing her condition but I know they are true. Especially after seeing a true life about obese gay men and the sexy thin guys who love to fuck them. Shes currently seeing two women, one she is very interested in but is a bitchy hard to get tease and the other a sweet neurotic woman who "wants someone to pay her mortgage and feed the kids" its all very interesting at first but it gets old pretty quick, so if someone doesnt call in I bail. The restaurants here are all very expensive and at the same rate unimpressive so I went on a wild search today trying to find a health food store, which to my surprise I did! I had a delicious meal of veggie italian sausages that I cooked on this really fun hibachi grill on my back porch with an avocado tomato salad. It was actually warm enough to not have to wear five layers today so I sat outside and enjoyed it all on the sand. 88 has been a good girl and is unusually lazy for a puppy. she sleeps a lot and whenever I try and find her she is either on the couch or in my bed under the sheets with her head on the pillow. She is definitely destined for diva-dom. I have been watching a lot of tv...mostly True Life, Hannah Montana, Unwrapped and of course Anthony Bourdain No Reservations. I havnt really been in the drinking scene for about a month now and I think its been really good for my body, although I would really like to warm up next to my loneliness with a bottle of tequila..haha. Or some Vendange AT LEAST! To be honest I cant wait to have any kind of company so if you have any idea of visiting me at all I suggest you let me know asap because if you make the time ill make it happen.. maybe haha. So no pictures but I do have a horrifying video that I suggest you watch. Its only a piece of an entire documentary that was really chilling. Call me beep me.
Cameron
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| Oy vey iz mir |
[29 Apr 2007|07:44pm] |
I am trying to hard to finish twelve paintings for tuesday and I am about to give up! but besides that everything in the world is going right I suppose. I rented a documentary that I watched in 10th grade history to try and bring myself back to earth and it motivated me to do a lot of things that I have been wanting to do for since the first time I saw it. I am submitting my global crossroad application to either send me to Jaipur India, or Tel Aviv Israel for six months. I will probably be leaving either in August or January, most likely the latter. I have nearly met my two year anniversary with Savannah which is a big indication to me that it is time to leave, so I am. I think indias a good place for me. I will be working with street children at the orphanage, helping them get ready for school, teaching arts and crafts, cooking etc. Basically being a mother, which I am. So I shaved my head to remind myself to conserve money (which is a little hard right now) and keep myself going in that direction. I also got a tattoo, applied for my passport and created a new amazon wish list. I think I'm ready now.
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switzerlandand's journal
